Tonight has been one giant sigh of relief. I attended the Newspeak concert and as the announcement came over the large screen TV, the band (which has never sounded better) went into a bangin cover of The Who’s Won’t Get Fooled Again. Everyone in the place was screaming at the top of their lungs, people were dancing, bawling, clapping along, hugging each other, and I was fighting back the tears. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. A weight felt lifted off of my shoulders. I walked outside to a city in revelry: shouts, screams, cheers coming from all directions. People walked by carrying American flags. Horns were honking all around me. Pure raw emotion reigned tonight. I screamed, cheered, whooed. It was an incredibly sentimental evening.
Maybe tomorrow I’ll feel embarrassed about how I feel right now: the innocent joy, the peace, the rampant optimism. But the buried grief and shame I feel for the thousands who have died for my country’s mistakes, the thousands who have suffered from a failing economy, the years of totalitarian-style propaganda in the media, the elevation of ignorance as a virtue, everything that has sickened me and made me wonder why the fuck I would want to live in this country has bubbled up to the surface and seems ready for deliverance. In short, I’m tired of the people in charge of my country making me feel like shit. That we now have one that makes me feel great is a really nice feeling.
I feel calm, happy, and comfortable. It was a good night.