If Juno Was 10 Times Shorter and 100 Times More Honest

Beautiful. From Cracked.com:

ELLEN PAGE guzzles SUNNY D as some obnoxious INDIE SONG
blares in the background so that everyone knows that this is
an intellectual, independent film.

She enters a convenience store and meets RAINN WILSON.

ELLEN PAGE

I need to use the bathroom, as I’ve been downing delicious, high-quality Sunny Delight for the past hour.

RAINN WILSON

Sunny Delight? You mean the delicious orange-flavored drink containing a full day’s supply of vitamin C in every serving?

ELLEN PAGE

That’s right! I found it in the fridge, behind the purple stuff! Now relinquish the bathroom key geeves, I for shizz need to spout.

RAINN WILSON

I can barely understand you. Is there a reason you’re talking like what seems like a teenager designed by a committee of adults that have researched youth by watching MTV around the clock?

ELLEN PAGE

Yes, and you better start talking like that too or you’ll have no place in the movie, Dwight.

RAINN WILSON

Oh, er, uh, I mean that’s one doodle that can’t be undid homeskillet oh my god I need a new agent.

ELLEN PAGE

You’re so quirky! And so am I!

My sentiments exactly.

3 Comments

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3 responses to “If Juno Was 10 Times Shorter and 100 Times More Honest

  1. Fragmentadora de Papel

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  2. The Gurftastic Blog

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  3. suzannemarques

    you brats!

    anyway, i was here to comment on the post & the comments section became more interesting.

    ok, back to juno. the first 15 minutes made me roll my eyes like every episode of dawson’s creek.

    but i did like the story in the end. anyway, all of wes anderson’s movies are so much better. the matchy outfits are much cuter :)

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