Monthly Archives: October 2007

October 5, 2007 · 10:35 pm

Freakball!

Maybe it’s because I’ve never really been big on sports, but I could care less about the steroid scandals!!! Seriously, what is the difference between taking a shot that aids muscle growth and working out on a machine? They’re both fucking unnatural! If it makes them play better baseball, track and field, early music, etc why the hell should it matter?? Freakball baby!! I wanna see hulking mass-men crushing baseball bats in their bare hands, veiny 7-foot-tall freaks with tiny nuts crushing the skulls of other freaks by throwing basketballs directly at their heads, neighing horse-women snapping calf-tendons at 25 mph leading to the mass-pile-up of 8 other equestrianite steroid atrocities.
I’ve long been a proponent of steroids in sports, I mean they are fighting a losing battle. Let Marion Jones keep the medals. Let Barry Bonds keep the needles and continue bashing little white balls into the heaven with the fierceness of a fucking supernova.

Btw, I’ll eventually have a more detailed description of my feelings on steroids in sports (I actually do believe what I just wrote). It’s something I’ve been working on in my mind for a while. Stay posted.

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Filed under Marion Jones, olympics, steroids, track and field, working out

October 5, 2007 · 10:12 pm

Mandatory Flag Pins!!

If I didn’t have a glimmer of hope that Obama might actually be the real thing, the flag pin controversy would be my kind of scandal. It seems almost like a dadaist prank someone secretly pulled on the candidates, making sure they all would have to wear flag pins from now until the day they die. Unfortunately, I may be naive but I think Obama could actually make a good president. My cynicism is screaming in the back of my head to wise up, especially given his less than enlightened gay marriage stance, but I am suspending my disbelief – he at least seems unwilling to engage in attack politicking, unlike his fellow candidates.
Please Jesus just don’t let the candidate be Hillary. Anyone, Edwards included, who would be willing to vote to give the president authorization to go to war, when it was SO obvious that the case was bullshit, will never get my vote, ever. I hate to say that unless Obama gets the nomination I will not vote, but I can’t imagine voting for anyone else. I don’t even agree with a number of his policies, he just actually seems to be somewhat honest, strong, and principled. I don’t know if I’ve seen a politician like that in my lifetime.

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Filed under Iraq, John Edwards, Obama, war

October 4, 2007 · 9:45 pm

New Radiohead album – Decide your own price.

Beautifully symbolic gesture from the greatest band in the world, not to mention a shrewd business decision. The days of paying for mp3s is fast coming to a close and the smart musicians are accelerating this sweet little apocalypse (Pssst!! Look to your left! Free Music!!!). Radiohead’s new album, free from their record contract, is going to be available for a name-your-own-price kinda deal (aside from a small processing fee). Sure, there will be people who decide to pay nothing, but that is where the art comes into this. Radiohead is posing the question to their fans: How much is our music worth to you? If I compare OK Computer‘s positive effect on my life in terms of the price of a beer in Manhattan then it is worth hundreds of dollars, because it has meant so much more to me than the collective buzzes I received from those beers did (Confusing? I know. It makes sense in my mind. I tend to quantify the importance of buying various things based on the exorbitant cost of beer at Manhattan bars. This book is 10 bucks? Well, I’ll spend more on two beers at the drop of a hat when I’m out drinking so I guess it’s worth it…) But I paid about 15 bucks for that album. Actually I first heard it for free on a tape my friend Christina made for me (Wow does that mean I’m old??). Then I went out and bought it.

They are also selling a special box set, with booklets and vinyl and all sorts of good stuff on it. It seems tempting. What I may do is download the mp3s for 5 bucks or something, and if it is as amazing as everyone knows it will be, then I’ll spring the 50 bucks or so for the box. Damn you Radiohead!

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Filed under Manhattan, Radiohead

October 4, 2007 · 9:08 pm

New Family Guys, what is happening??

I don’t really know what to make of the new season of The Family Guy. The season premier (the Star Wars parody was really good, but I noticed several scenes where the momentum seemed to die, and the insane, ever-present punchlines just didn’t come. In the last episode from Sunday, titled Movin out (Brian’s Song) (a characteristic FG triple-entendre), this was much more striking. I’m a huge fan, I consider it one of my top shows along with Lost, BSG, and It’s Always Sunny. I have defended its humor whenever I get a chance – they don’t need to rely on plot like South Park and The Simpsons. It is slapstick. Plot didn’t really matter in the comedy classic Airplane and it needn’t in FG.

But something very different is going on and I think it is intentional. This episode had several scenes that ended without punchlines, not with failed punchlines (every episode has a couple, I accept it), but literally the scenes just ended. Some were meant to be sad, some meant to be awkward (I think…), but some just… ended. Very strange.

Notably, there were the extended scenes with Carl, played by H. Jon Benjamin from Home Movies and Dr. Katz (as well as numerous cameos on almost every Adult Swim cartoon). Those scenes in particular seemed to draw inspiration from the bone-dry humor in those shows. I like that humor, in Home Movies particularly, but that has never really been FG’s selling point. I relish those mundane, realist conversations that flavor and temper the off-the-wall humor in FG, but trying to build a show on that sort of banter is fundamentally changing the show. I dug those awkward movie conversations between Chris and Carl, but you need the fast-paced slapstick humor and offensive one-liners to give those mundane scenes any sort of weight. In a well-balanced episode, those scenes prove to be more tense than the ones that end up causing controversy.

I’m not ready to admit that FG has gone astray yet, I mean I tolerated the Nikki and Paolo episodes in the third season of Lost, but they need to get their balance back. In almost every episode, season 3 and after, I have had at least a couple moments where I could not control my laughter. I don’t think I had one audible after viewing this episode.

And I sure as hell cherish my laughing time.

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Filed under It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Lost, Movin out, Simpsons, South Park

October 4, 2007 · 8:37 pm

Ableton Live 7 Announced!

Freakin’ awesome. Ableton, the company that makes the software with which I make pretty much all of my music, has just announced their new version of Live and has begun limited beta-testing (including your’s truly). So far it looks mainly like an answer to many of the requests that users have been itching for on the Ableton Forum: mixed time-signatures, updated automation, better drum sequencing, better effects (visualized compression yay!). I have yet to see ways in which the program has been revolutionized, such as with Version 6’s Rack feature, although several new features look very promising.

The best new feature, as far as I can tell, is the new Drum Rack which seems to crush any need for the now antiquated Impulse drum machine (I’m sure there will still be some quaint ways to utilize it). Drum Rack seems somewhat modeled on Battery from Native Instruments, which after messing with for a bit, used to make me return to my little Impulse with a shrug. You can now map drums, or any other sample or software instrument for that matter, to a midi note (shown in a neat little MPC-like visual. Each mapped note can be clicked on for editing either the audio sample (in a Simpler-like box) or the MIDI instrument. You can also add individual effects to each sound and incorporate subsequent racks to create a literally infinite sound chain. For those of us who make beat-oriented music, this is huge. Each signal also has its own mixer controls so that you can monitor and control panning and volume in the session view.

There are also several new soft-synths: an analog-modeling synth, an electric piano modeler, and a string synth. I’ve tinkered with the first two and, since I’ve been increasingly using synth and keys in my tunes, I’ll likely end up buying them. They get a unique sound that is very distinct from Operator.

The beta seems a little slow and buggy, but that could just be my busted-ass Powerbook, which is terminally on the fritz.

I was hoping for some earth-shattering new feature, possibly involving the Cycling 74 partnership, but looks like we may have to wait a bit (hopefully they are just holding the surprise!).

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Filed under MPC, Native Instruments, soft-synths

October 2, 2007 · 2:19 pm

Fired for Excessive Perfume

Beautiful, I love it. Now if there were only some way to get it through peoples’ heads that drenching yourself in perfume/cologne before getting on the subway is so incredibly rude. I routinely have to change cars while on the subway because someone felt the need to cover the musty subway stank with their chemical scent juice. Hey, I’m used to the subway stank. I can handle it. But perfume-so-thick-I-can-almost-feel-it drives my allergies insane! Not to mention the faux-pas of wearing it during a concert. I swear to god anytime I play a gig with a choir (more so with youth/community choirs) I have to forgo the use of my nose for the next hour or two, bla!

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Filed under NY Post, Perfume